For A Girl (2004)
"for a girl" is my second album, a collection of emo songs written during and after a relationship. for these songs, i started using ACID 2.0 to create the drum tracks, which made completing songs a much easier and tighter process. the album was recorded on a Korg 24-track digital recorder -- nicknamed John Korg -- and mixed by Andrew Gau Laben.
"love #2" - 8/19/03
an empty road stands in front of me
precarious as usual
my eyes scan the horizon
visual capacity is full
waves of heat pass over unwanted highway lines
indecision, i don't know which way to go
give me a sign
and there you appeared
standing in innocence right in front of me
and you held my hand
guiding me in a valuable direction
a once empty road lies behind me
slipping from my memory
all attention focused on my rescuer
you saved me from myself, you saved me from everything
waves of heat pass over us
and quickly we melt into one
a union unforeseeable, unpredictable
so perfect
and there you appear
standing in innocence right in front of me
and you hold my hand
and i willingly will follow
wherever you may go
wherever you may guide me
and you may never know
the love i have inside me
but the empty roads ahead
and vast empty horizon
don't seem so empty now because of you
"i look at you" - 10/25/03
i look at you because i can't resist
i look at you because i can't look away
i look at you because you're everything
i look at you and i want to stay
...here with you, forever
with you, forever
with you, forever
with you, for eternity!
i look at you and it makes me smile
i look at you and it makes me happy
i look at you and it makes me melt
i look at you and it makes me want to be
...here with you, forever
with you, forever
with you, forever
with you, for eternity!
you're perfections are so imperfect
you're imperfections are so perfect
i look at you because i want to
i look at you because i want you forever
"i miss you forever" - 12/20/03 **personal favorite**
i'm quoting you
a poem you wrote for me
what seems like long ago
it has so much meaning now
you were the air i breathe
you were the food i eat
and now we're on a break
it's so hard to take
it's burning a whole deep within my soul
i don't know how it affects you
but i hope it's just as painful
it's only been a few days
a few days of misery
i long for you
i hope to see you soon
it's only been a few days
but it feels like forever
and so i miss you forever
"free at last" - 7/12/04
what happened to us?
we used to be so happy
but we've become a waste
of time and energy
apparently our love
just isn't good enough
and so you've gone away
this will sure be tough
i can still smell
your beautiful hair
i can still see
the sparkle in your eyes
but sparkles fade away
and there's nothing i can do
maybe one day you'll appreciate me
cause i'll always love you
i can't breathe
i can't sleep
i can't eat
but i can weep
and i know this is how it's supposed to be
i can't love you and you can't love me
and as hard as it will be
i've finally set you free
i can't breathe
i can't sleep
i can't eat
but i can weep
(but i've finally set you free
i've finally set you free
you're free at last)
"fix" - 7/17/04
all i feel is pain
running through my veins
how do i not feel this way anymore
such and awful burn
i will forever yearn
to not feel this way anymore
there is only one cure
so innocent and pure
but its status is only temporary
i need a hit of your love
to help me float above
this painful world that scares me
youre floating through my veins
why won't it go away
why does it have to be this way
i just want my drug
i just want your love
and its driving me insane
"why does it hurt so much?" - 07/19/04
i don't know how to give you up
it hurts so much when i try
the tears burn so much when i cry
burning a hole through my heart
all i ever wanted was to be good for you
but sometimes things just aren't good enough
the tears burn so much when i cry
the pain stays no matter how hard i try
i'm so afraid
to let you go
afraid of losing you
afraid to know
that our love
has really gone away
no matter how much
i want you to stay
why does it hurt so much?
why can't it be easier?
why do i hang on when nothing is for sure?
the standing ovation is complete
the audience has gone away
off go the lights and down fall the curtains
but still i sit
waiting
hoping
for an encore
waiting
hoping
for your return
why does it hurt so much?
"the perfect kiss" - 8/6/04
the sunrise
shined in my eyes
and when it all cleared
you were standing here
with arms outstretched
you looked perfect
your lips gleaming
and you leaned to me
and smiled
your perfect smile
it only took a little while
and we had the perfect kiss
but now the sun sets
and it wets my beaten eyes
i let out a sigh
we've come so far together
through sun and stormy weather
but the darkness on our face
says its time to leave this place
and your smile
your perfect smile
can be but only a memory
but still you have the perfect kiss
and i will always remember our perfect kiss